Parramatta veteran Luke Burt admits his last-minute miss in Sunday's heartbreaking loss to the Tigers is among the darkest moments of his 12-year NRL career.
Burt, who kicks at an 85 percent success rate, had a chance to send the must-win match into golden-point extra time with 26 seconds left on the clock.
But the likeable 29-year-old failed to connect from 25m out and almost directly in front, leaving the Eels needing an almost impossible task make the finals with two rounds remaining.
The veteran winger, who was too distraught to talk to the media after the match, broke his silence on Monday morning and admitted he is still coming to terms with his season-ending miss.
"It's hard to compare it to grand final losses but it's definitely easily up there in the top three worst feelings after a game," Burt, who admitted shedding a few tears, said.
"It's hard to say it wasn't me (who was to blame for the loss). I had the opportunity at the end and it does hurt."
"I actually thought I hit it ok and it just didn't go over. That's part of the job I do and I take pride in my kicking and it's just one of those things where it was shattering and it's hard to get over something like that, but I'm going to have to."
"I honestly didn't know how to react and I can't even remember what I did to be honest with you but it hit home when I got in the shed, I know that."
Burt is still unsure as to exactly what went wrong, insisting he stuck to his normal routine and felt confident moving into the ball.
"I don't think I've missed for a few weeks so I felt pretty confident," he said.
"I knew it was an important kick ... but it's just one of those things mate, I can't honestly explain it. I haven't watched it again and I'm probably only going to watch it once again just to see what went wrong but it's just one of those things."
"Beforehand I obviously knew the importance of it but it wasn't too different to what I do any other time."
Asked how many times he has replayed the kick in his head, a shattered Burt replied: "I couldn't even tell you how many times mate."
"It's gone over and over and it's something that I had to sort of get around the kids as much as possible to take the mind away from it. They were a really good support, my wife and two kids were great and it's something that'll be playing in my head for a couple of days I reckon."
Indeed, Burt's three-year-old son Lincoln was quick to put things in perspective:
"My young fella asked me what was wrong and I said 'I lost footy' and he said 'I'll help you find it'," Burt recalled.
"They always just bring you back so it was good."
Burt vowed to somehow put his disappointment behind him ahead of Friday's clash against South Sydney and stressed the importance of finishing the season off strongly.
"I've got to do it (move forward) for the team ... I've got to put that behind me and get ready for Friday night and hopefully if I get another opportunity I won't miss," he said.
"You always hang on to that odd chance and you might get lucky enough but we've just got to go out and do our best and at least finish on a good note in the last couple of games."